We are used to accepting love and sex as a package deal. There is no one without the other. Love those you sleep with and sleep with those you love…
Love is created when there is intimacy and emotional closeness. In love the body is there mainly to express closeness, warmth, intimacy. The soft touch, caressing.
Sex is created and blooms when there is foreignness, for example in a library, bus, workplace, etc. The more you know the person, the more the sexual desire fades. Sex has a lot of body and little emotion and mind. The touch is stormy, instinctive, sometimes aggressive; Shaking; Crushing, strong – expresses, passion and passions..
Falling in love is based on a desire to be like, along with, a wish to merge. We are in love with those who are similar to us and we become similar to those we love.
In sex the attraction is based alienation and alienation increase the attraction.
Probably in a small community where there is closeness and intimacy it is easier for most to fall in love because of the atmosphere, those who fall in love will be many. But in a mega-society based on alienation, where many hundreds of people are met and seen and being changed
every day- sexual desire is constantly intensifying. The more people we have no personal connection with – the more sexual desire will intensify. The grass beyond the fence is greener….
And if we take it one step further then if in order to love one must know, in order to feel sexual attraction it is better not to know’.
The acquaintance creates intimacy which is for love – bad for sex. The desire for sex s with strangers, who live for us in anonymity. Many sexual objects wear dark sunglasses, have frozen, opaque facial of sexual storm.
Those sexual objects have a gaze which is limited, through half-closed eyes, and an out of the corner of the eye, it give a mysterious sexual promise. In love the gaze is long and steady.
In sex, they remove the manners of culture and become wild again. .
Our society does not want to separate the two, because then sex will be left to run wild and destroy by the wild storm of the sexual desire much. So love acts as a policeman.
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For further reading:
Michel Foucault,, History of Sexuality, Vol. I, Hebrew: Gabriel Ash, Tel Aviv: United Kibbutz, 1996.
Gabriel